How Decisions Work Better Than Resolutions

In the new year and most people make resolutions, filled with hope and determination. Our health club always gets busy in January. We have to arrive early for classes in order to get a space. By March the classes are back to the pre-New Year size, as the resolve behind the resolutions fade away until the next year. After noticing the same resolutions appearing year after year on my list, I revised my technique for creating change in my life. I'd like to share a technique that I now use to make my vision become reality – a method to create your best year yet with positivity, even amidst adversity.

Many resolutions are disciplinary and based on self deprecation. For example, a list may look like this:
1. Lose weight (Meaning: “I’m fat.”).
2. Exercise more (“Because I don’t.”)
3. Find a relationship or be a better mate (“Because I’m lonely or failing in my relationship now.”).
4. Grow my business or find a better job (“Because I’m not where I want to be.”).
All of these resolutions reflect valid life goals. Each one also harbors some degree of self berating and lack of belief in the ability to accomplish the goal.

Instead of making resolutions I now create intentions and decisions for how I want my life to be. I prefer the word “decision” over “resolution;” deciding what life is like instead of resolving to change it. The technique I teach involves five steps to create the life you dream of.

1. Create a great need or feel a strong desire within you for whatever it is you want.
2. Define your desire in a positive manner, being very specific.
3. Clear your limiting beliefs (see www.TheAwarenessInitiative.com to download a free limiting beliefs worksheet).
4. Ask for what you want.
5. Know that your desire is taking place for you in your life now.

These steps lead you to make a decision and be the person who has what you desire, instead of one who resolves to change in the future. For example:

1. Instead of resolving to lose weight create a need to be a lean and healthy person right now. Then, d
2. Define what you as a lean person eats and does during the day. Clearly define what eating healthy and exercising means to you, and be honest. Healthy eating could mean eating foods that are low in saturated fat, low in chemicals and sugar, and eating in moderation.
3. Clear the beliefs that say you will never be healthy and lean.
4. Project your desire to your body and to the universe.
5. See the lean person within you and be it. Instead of “losing weight,” decide that you now are a person who eats the right quantity of healthy foods and exercise regularly.

Now that your intention is decided be aware when you make choices. Eating healthy is not a resolution that you can put off until tomorrow. You have decided that you are already that person. Feel it. Know it. Believe it, and you will make the correct food choices and will exercise. When you make the correct choice you’ll feel proud and good about yourself, which will encourage you to continue to make more correct choices. Weight loss will naturally occur.

If you’re still making choices that do not support your intention, ask yourself again if you have a strong enough desire and really believe you can be that person. Thoughts may go through your head like: “I’ll never do this. I’ve been trying to eat better for years and I don’t have the will power.” Or, "I love sweets too much. I can’t resist them.” It’s important to notice these beliefs, release and change them. You can change, “I can’t do this,” to “I eat healthy foods in moderate portions.” Redo your limiting beliefs worksheet, pinpoint and work through these beliefs. Notice what you’re thinking and replace those destructive thoughts and habits with new affirmations.

You can also ask for help with your goals. Ask friends and family to believe in your new image. Know that you are supported by others and by the energy around you. If you intend and believe firmly in your goal and know you’ll get help, you will. You may be offered a discounted membership to a health club. A friend may ask you to walk with her. You may be invited to a healthy cooking class.

This method of intention and decision making works well and is kinder and more effective than creating negatively based resolutions. Start to look forward to your best year ever. You are the change in your life. Your decisions support you. Believe in yourself and be kind to yourself. Define your desire, open to it, ask for it, and know it’s true for you.